EVERY VINE EVER
– White people be like: – Hello, my name is Roger. I drive a Ford Focus and I drink soy milk. (laughter) – Black people be like: – What?! Go ahead and finish it, man. What do Black people be like? – Okay, let’s go! – I love Tyler Perry. – (Ian) Every Vine ever. – Smack cam! (air horn blares)
– OOOOH! MY EYEEEEE! – (Ian) Every Vine ever. – Are you sure this is gonna work?
– Dude, totally! Just hit that ramp,
you’ll fall in that soft pile of leaves. It’ll be a hilarious fail. Go! – Okay!
– Do it! – Okay! (grunts) Oh god! (groans) – Dillon? Oh my god…
face-first into a fire hydrant? That is EPIC!!!
Whoa, good thinking, little bro. Yeah! – (Ian) Every Vine. – (soulfully) ♪ I don’t think so-o-o-o ♪ Yeah. (ka-ching!)
– (soulfully) ♪ I don’t think so-o-o-o ♪ ♪ (happy-go-lucky music) ♪ ♪ (ominous music) ♪ OH-HO! (singing) ♪ I don’t think so-o-o-o-o ♪ – (Ian) Every six second loop ever. – Hey, what’s up, Vine? Make sure to follow me on Twitter,
Instagram, Snapchat, Tumblr, Facebook, Photobucket, Yelp–
uh, no, no, no. Oh, f– DAMMIT! Okay. (takes a breath) (speaking faster) Hey, guys!
Make sure to follow me on Twitter, Snapchat, Facebook, Tumblr, Pinterest,
uh… Google, Apple Maps, uh, t– (heavy sigh) (speaking rapidly) Hey, guys!
Make sure to follow me on Instagram, Twitter, Snapchat, Facebook,
Spotify, healthcare.gov, Yahoo, Instagram, Apple Maps, Tinder–
F*CK NO!!! GRRR! F*CK! [BLEEP]! (groans) Mooom? I need another phone again. – (Ian) Every GIF ever. ♪ (steamy music) ♪ – Oh, yeah, that’s gonna make a great Vine. I’m gonna post this right now. – (Ian) Every Vine be like: – So he carried you home? I guess that’s why they
call it a “pick up line”. (laughs) Was that good? – So good! Hilarious. – Was it?
– Yes, don’t doubt yourself. Guys? – You are awesome!
– Come on, you are so great. – Don’t doubt it.
– I mean, come on! – Yeah! – (Ian) Vine. (chuckles) – DOUBLE SMACK CAM!!! – No! NOOOO!
(air horn blares) AAAH, MY OTHER EYE! AAAAAAAAHHHHH! – (Ian) Do it for the Vine! – So you’re a pretty cool girl. Do you ever think you wanna
go out with me sometime? – (singing soulfully)
♪ I don’t think so-o-o-o-o-whoaaaaa ♪ – (Ian) VINE! ♪ (EDM music) ♪ (vapid giggle) Girls be like: – (shrieks)
– OH! – Oh! (gasps) Anyway… (cheerfully) Girls be like… OH! F*CK!!! (tires squeal) (loud crash) – (Ian) Every seamless loop ever. – Remember, happiness is the way. Always be good to your bae. – Babe, are you hungry?
I made that soup you like. I slaved over it for hours.
I’d hope you– (spits loudly)
(squeals) – THIS TASTES LIKE SH*T! – (Ian) Every trick shot ever. – After looking at your chart, it does appear that you have herpes. – (sighs) Oh my god! – I’m very sorry. – How bad is it? – It’s… it’s pretty bad. – But do you think I’ll live? – (singing soulfully)
♪ I don’t think so-o-o-o-aaaaah ♪ – God f*cking dammit!!!
– ♪ Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah ♪ – (Ian) Every Vine ever. – (whimpering) Oh my god. – I actually feel kinda bad. Hey, man, I just wanna say
I’m really sorry for this ULTIMATE SMACK DOWN!!!! (air horn blares) (Ian splutters and screams) – (Ian) Hey, guys, thank you
so much for watching. Click the video on the left to see bloopers
and this “thirsty” deleted scene: ♪ (steamy music) ♪ – Son, the Hot Pockets are– (loud gasp) – Yeah!
– (dad) Oh god! – Dad, get out!
We’re making a thirst trap video! – (Ian) And click the video on the right
to see our new show Seriously Stupid Sleepover,
featuring the bathboys. – Whoever can throw up the first wins.
– NO! – Yeah. (glugging)
(loud belch) (woman screeches) – (Ian) It’s not that stupid. Just watch it, you’ll see. And if you’re watching this
on a TV or touchscreen device, all the links are in the description below.