JUST LIKE LINK
Yeah! (grunts) (Ian) Shut up!! You just gotta hold your sword up
to build your power energy. (narrator) Hey, stupid cosplayer! I’m not stupid! I am. (narrator) Are you tired of being losers
without a real Master Sword? A real Master Sword exists?! (narrator) That’s right!
And here it is! (screaming) (moaning) Cool! ♪ If you want your life to get better ♪ ♪ In a blink ♪ ♪ Use the Master Sword ♪ ♪ Just like Link ♪ Can’t wait to show this to my mom. (narrator) Master Sword can help you
with all sorts of things. Now you can borrow money,
just like Link! Sorry, mom, but I gotta do this. Do what? (screams) (porcelain shatters) Ooh, sweet! 25 cents. (narrator) Sew your girly tights,
just like Link! Sew, sew, sew, sew! (narrator) Stock Broker,
just like Link! Sell, sell, sell! Stop right there, cosplayer! I’m sorry! I’m just trying to rush to the hospital
to fix this stab wound. Don’t care. (narrator) Get out of at ticket,
just like Link! What-What are you doing? No! (grunts) Justice served. Hurumph! (narrator) Um…yeah. You can kill prostitutes,
just like Link! Excuse me, just one moment. Uh, why do you assume
all prostitutes are women? That’s so sexist. There are plenty
of male prostitutes out there. (narrator) Let’s just be
politically correct and say you can kill people that you
sometimes pay for sexual favors that are sometimes men,
just like Link! I have a penis! All right! (narrator) You don’t have to take
my word for it, though. Listen to all these! Hey, wake up!
Are you still with me? I can see the white light.
I’m coming, grandma. (narrator) Great!
Now listen to these satisfied customers. I don’t understand why people
don’t realize how much better – Xbox games are–
– (narrator) This is the best money I ever spent.
Now I can be just like Link. Thank you, Master Sword! This sword is great!
How do I get one of my own? (narrator) Here!
Just take this one. (groans) (whimpers) Seriously?! Sweet! Thanks. Gimmie all your money
or I’ll shoot ya and stick my finger in your belly button
so the situation gets really awkward. (wind whistles) What do I do now?! You just gotta hold your sword up
to build your power energy! Duh! All right, here I go! ♪ (video game music) ♪ How come nothing’s working? (narrator) What?!
It’s a fake replica sword from a video game!
Ugh, stupid cosplayer. So it’s not real? – (gunshot)
– Ugh! What the f*ck?! ♪ If you want your life to get better ♪ ♪ In a blink ♪ ♪ Use the Master Sword ♪ ♪ Just like Link ♪ (Anthony) Hey, guys.
If you haven’t already seen the Honest Game Trailer
for Super Smash Brothers, you need to!
Click the video on the right. It’s awesome. (Honest Trailer guy) Enjoy the best
multi-player experience since Flip Cup, where you can beat your friends
and ruin your friendships at the same time! (Ian) Or if you wanna see deleted scenes
and bloopers from this video… Sell, sell, sell! Why did I have to hit it so hard? (narrator) Lose your job,
just like Link! You’re fired. ..click the box on the left. (shrill voice) Click the subscribe button,
just like Link! (Ian) What is that accent? (Anthony) That’s an Australian accent.
It’s perfect. (Ian) Okay, it was pretty good. (Anthony) Thanks. [Captioned by Subtitle YouTube]